The Good, The Bad and The Annoying!

E-Enterprise makes me feel like this:



Taking Friday off to hang out with my best friend makes me feel like this:



Little kids usually always make me want to do this:

Musical

One of my main pet peeves with bands is that these days a good majority of them sound like someone else and they completely lack any type of musical creativity. I've only heard one song by this band and I don't even remember it, but the idea behind this website reminds me of my childhood, and that's always a good thing. Plus, It's Jack White's new band. I liked The Whites Stripes last album.

Word.


It has a very 1980's DOS feel to it.

Since i'm on the topic of music and my last post had some "rant" to it, I'll keep it alive. I can't stand generic band reviews. When I say generic, I mean, The verbiage involved.

Here are the top 5 things I hate to see when reading a review of a band:

1. The word "Infectious" i.e. "Their infectious style will make you want to do a back flip."

2. The word "hails" i.e. "This lame ass band hails from Chicago..."

3. The word "quartet" i.e. "This lame ass pop punk quartet hails from Atlanta, GA."

4. When the reviewer comes across a slang term that he/she thinks makes them sound cooler i.e. "Prog-rock", "Piano-rock" etc.

5. Superficial Elitism - I understand that when people are hired or even get the OK as a volunteer to review a new album or band they think they're hot shit, but they must learn that true elitism is more deeply routed. It's just annoying to see someone spouting of their opinion with no evidence credibility. Anyone can trash a shitty band.

That's all.

Signs of life

"I play on the internet too much, therefore I blog."

There is a million things to do on the internet these days. I figure that I might as well be productive and have something to show for it. Therefore, I blog. I guess blogging about blogging is cliche. It's like wearing a Green Day shirt to a Green Day concert. You never want to be that guy. I don't think I've ever been that guy. Even when I was in middle school. I think I just subconciously knew.

We all know what we do when we see that guy though. We look at each other and give the look. The look says "Dude, that guy is wearing the bands shirt to their show, what a dumb fuck." Well, in terms of blogging, i'm turning it around.

Why start a blog and then abondon it? I'm sure I might get some comments about how I should get a real life and blah blah blah, it's just the internet. The thing is though, I do have a life. I work 50 hours a week. I have alot of friends. I have a beautiful girlfriend. I don't stop running around. I have less time to blog than anyone, minus the fact that I sit in front of a computer all day, but still.

I'm busy. I have to fit it into the schedule. I have to think of something to say.

I don't post this to be an ass. I post this to be encouraging. A million thoughts go through all of our heads every day. Put it into words. Entertain us. Don't get us hooked on reading your blog and then disappear into no man's land. Where ever the hell that is.

I know so many fucking good writers and artists and they don't use their talents. God damn it! Show up! Don't let guys like me take your spotlight just because we'll write. Don't let fuckers like Thomas Kinkade get rich off his dumb shit paintings of houses.


Create.

What dreams may come a.k.a. Johnny C. vs. Burt Reynolds

I had one of the strangest dreams last night.

Typically, when I dream it’s random events and it’s nothing remotely close to a nightmare. I’ll usually be somewhere odd or from childhood and I’ll see other random people there and that’s about it. I really don’t even have nightmares anymore. A headless demon could be chasing me around with the bloody bones of my mother that he’s carved into knives, chanting “6-6-6, kill, kill, kill, die, die, die” and it probably wouldn’t really scare me that much. I think the reason for this is because I always subconsciously know that it’s a dream.

Last night, I recall a number of jumbled dreams, but the main one being about Burt Reynolds chasing me. I'm not talking current Burt, I'm talking 70's "Longest Yard" I'm going to kick your ass Burt. I knew he wasn’t going to kill me, but I knew he was going to do something unpleasant to me. Hopefully, nothing reminiscent of what happened to his buddy in “Deliverance”. I think he may have wanted information, but I don’t know what for.



Burt chased me through a mall, a restaurant and even a hotel. I went down an elevator in the hotel that scared the shit out of me. I honestly think the hotel probably exists some where in Columbia.Druglords launder money and hide out there, but they're all afraid of the elevator. I also had to go through some weird passage that reminded me of something out of Charlie and The Chocolate Factory.

In the end, Burt caught up with me. I think I kind of gave up because I wanted an autograph. At this point, Burt turned into my friend Joe who works at one of the restaurants I run poker for, I didn't want his autograph. My punishment for running and withholding unknown to me information from Burt/Joe, He/they pulled on my toes. Not even pulling them off, just pulling them. It hurts to think about it.

Honestly, in real life, I think I would much rather be punched in the face by Shaq or even listen to one of his rap albums all the way through, than have my toes pulled. I’m glad it was only a dream. I’m glad I’ve never listened to a Shaq rap album all the way through either.


Shoot,Pass,Slam

Flickr? I hardly know her.

To my loyal readers, all 7 of you ladies, and Kevin.

I'm pretty excited to say that I finally got a Flickr account. I messed with it a few months back, but decided to make it work today.

Anyway, feel free to check out the link on the right-hand side of the screen and comment on some of my ridiculous pictures.

Word.

Talent

I sure hope this guy got his big break!

He deserves it!

Jerry Falwell is a Pimp Daddy!

Jerry Falwell.

Do I really need to say anything else? I get agitated thinking about the man. Anyway, I came across this story in The National Liberty Journal. Liberty is the Univeristy that Jerry Falwell started.

I'm surprised they would even mention Johnny Cash on their website. He smoked, did drugs, drank and cheated on his wife. Yeah, he cleaned up his act, but to criticize a movie that really didn't talk about the last 35 years of his life is ridiculous. The last 35 years is when he mainly focused on his faith anyway.

I wonder if they have ever listened to any of his songs that weren't hymns?

I'm sure they would love "Cocaine Blues".

Anyway, screw Falwell. I got on this site looking for his Bobble Head. Oh yes, They made one. I'd post a picture, but I can't find one anywhere on the internet. Damn it!

UPDATE:

I didn't find a Johnny Cash Bobble Head, but I did find his soon to be released action figure!!



Here's more info on it! Just in case you want one for yourself!

I will have a picture of the Falwell Bobble Head soon. I'm working on it.

Peanut Butter Acrobatics

When kids are growing up they always think of their parents being so old. I’ll start over. I thought my baby sitter was old when I was a kid. I remember asking her what grade she was in.

“10^th grade!” she said. I was only in kindergarten. 10^th grade seemed along ways away. Now I’m on the other end of the spectrum, and 10^th grade still seems along ways away.

We all know how it goes. When you’re a kid time moves so slowly. When you’re in school the clock doesn’t move fast enough, but when you’re an adult 5pm can often times come too fast (well, not really). Monday turns into Friday, March turns into April, spring turns to summer and before you know it, it’s Christmas time again.

It’s amusing to me that kids think their parents are so wise and all-knowing, because when you’re 6, they are.

At the ripe old age of 24, nothing for the most part has been hidden from me regarding my parents and I know most of their mistakes and short comings. I don’t say that from a judgmental point of view, but honestly from a graceful standpoint. I’m actually glad my parents made some mistakes and are up front about them. It allows me to feel OK with the ones that I’ve made. I know my parents and most parents love their children and do the best that they can. What else can they do? It’s fucking kids raising kids.

My mom was married at 19 and had her first child at 22. That doesn’t really compute when you hear that as a kid, but when you get to be 19 or 22 it kicks in that, that’s kind of fucking insane! I didn’t know what the hell I was doing at 19, let alone at 22 and I still wonder what the hell is going on now, and I’ll be 25 in July!

That’s probably what a mid-life crisis is, some dude wakes up at 45, with a wife and three kids and still doesn’t know what the hell is going on. I think that’s just life though. It’s all fun and games or maybe its fucking turmoil and pain, but if you take a step back, it’s ridiculous one way or another. It’s all pretty humorous.

I think it all goes back to the playground. A bunch of kids standing around picking sides for kickball, everyone wants to get picked. Everyone wants to be accepted. Everyone wants to win the game for their team. Next time, you’re at the office or even sitting in Starbuck’s looking at some business man or anyone over the age of 30 for that matter, just think about them playing kickball. It’s the same fucking thing. They’re just playing the adult version.

My mom gave me some pretty good advice when I was 18 and really confused about what I wanted to do with my life.

She said, “Johnny, some of the most interesting people I know, still don’t know what they want to do when they grow up, and they’re in their 40’s.”

Maybe she said that because she was in her 40’s at the time and wasn’t sure what the hell she wanted to be doing. Maybe all of those people are interesting, but fucking crazy. Or maybe all of those people are still just kids trying to make it in the world. That’s what I think it is. It’s not about arriving it’s about the journey. We’re all going to get their one way or another. I think the key is to have peace about the way you get there.

"Your Momma is an eyesore!"

I'd have to say, that I honestly hate Wal-Mart. I recently found out that they're going to be building at least two of them inside the perimeter of Atlanta very soon. I almost dry heaved typing that. I've always admired the City of Atlanta for keeping Wally World out, but I guess you can only fight the monster for so long, or hold out for the largest sum of money that they will pay to build.

What's sick, is that I still will shop at Wal-Mart because you can buy a toaster there for $6. When you only use the toaster on average once a month, a $6 toaster is a good buy. That's why, even though it goes against all that is within me and stains my soul black when I walk through their doors, I will still shop there.

On a brighter note, I came across a website this morning that addresses a very important issue: What the hell do we do with these Huge fucking buildings, if God forbid, Wal-mart or some super store that takes up 1,000 acres goes out of business? It's pretty radical to see what people are doing around the country with these eyesores.

Check out the site: Big Box Re-use!

The girl who did all of the research is coming out with a book and a documentary as well. It should prove to be some interesting material.

"Hey kid, I'm a computer..."

Holy Shiz-nit!

I'm starting to get ticked off at my home PC. My wireless got jacked up, so I decided to buy 100 ft. of cat 5 cable. It's currently running through the entire house. That worked for about a day until, what I believe to be the power supply, started messing up. Now I can't even power the damn thing up. I'm going to get it fixed this week at some point, but until then I have to use the old work computer. I don't mind, but I get a little busy here and I don't always have time to blog.

Anyway, here is how I feel about my computer right now.


Maybe, I should stop all the downloading.

You're going to need more than a little loose change...

"Hey Man, could you get me a Diet Coke and an Ipod Shuffle? "

This Magic Moment...

My lovely lady friend and I ventured up to Lexington, KY last weekend to visit my Mom and see her performance in the musical, Carousel. This glorious production was held at the old Opera House in downtown Lexington. If you are familiar with theatre my Mom played Mrs. Mullins. Unfortunately, the majority of the actors/actresses were opera students and though they could sing beautifully, their acting was at times was below par. It was worth it to see my Mom act again. It had been a while.

My best friend who lives outside of Cincinnati came down for the weekend as well. I hadn't seen him since New Years and Ashley had never met him before, so I was killing a few birds with one stone on this trip.

After we got out of the play we decided to have an impromptu photo shoot. I am only partially responsible for what ensued.

"Come and knock on our door."

Ray and I share everything.

"To the trees!!"

"He taught me everything I know about flying."

Overall, we had a really good time, minus driving 10 + hours in one weekend, but atleast we got to see the Colonel.

Without pain, without sacrifice, we would have nothing.

Where does the time go? I’ve been so busy lately at work and my wireless at home has been out for a week, with those conditions it makes it hard to post.

The reason I’ve been so busy at work is because a couple of weeks ago, my bosses called my co-worker and I into a meeting and asked if we would sell. Selling isn’t a problem, but when you’re hired for a customer relations role and then later asked to sell it could possibly be an issue. Salaries and responsibilities really didn’t change though and everything we sell we get a commission on top of our salary. You can’t really beat that. So we agreed.

We jumped in pretty quick and we’ve been tearing it up. In 8 day we’ve made 10 sales. I was fortunate enough to have sold this product before so it was just a matter of getting back in the groove, but my co-worker had never sold before. He’s off to a “fantastic” start though and I know he’s going to continue to perform.

So all is good in the land of cubicles, automated voice messages and styrofoam coffee cups. This new responsibility has given me a renewed vigor for my job. I really needed a challenge and this was just what I needed.

Also, to fix the wireless problem I bought 100 ft. of Cat5 cable. I have a long ass cable going through the entire house now, but at least I have internet up in my room again. I guess I can bring the Xbox up there now as well. With everything running smoothly again, hopefully I can stay on top of my almost daily regiment of blogging.