Thursday, December 16, 2010
All of our anger and rage, bitterness and hate, still hoping that it won't over take our love and choke out our life. Being in love is supposed to suffice, but I've never seen it.
What's mine is yours and yours is mine, but I paid no mind to what you had in mind because I thought it was all mine. How could I have been so blind?
If the truth will set you free, it will also set you on fire. It can burn down walls, brick and mortar, leaving only a foundation that hopefully remains for a better tomorrow.
Wednesday, December 01, 2010
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Friday, November 26, 2010
Saturday, September 18, 2010
His second wind finally blows into the car catching his hair and twisting it in his face as he moves his head up and down to the beat. Zeppelin starts to fade and there’s so much static in the speakers his hair is about to stand up on end. He passes the water tower that he rolls his eyes at every morning for having the obligatory positive slogan for the small town. “Half way home.” He quietly says.
Without music to listen to, he feels the weight of the day dragging his eye lids further and further down until they’re completely shut.
“This place seems to be hopping tonight. I wonder if it’s like this every night?” He thinks to himself. While standing in line trying to get a drink he spots a beautiful girl wearing a black sequin dress making her way to the bar. She flashes him a smile. He would’ve preferred something else. The bar tender asks him for his drink order right in time to keep him from staring. The band strikes up as he places his order. He tries to speak up so the man can hear him, but the blasts of the trumpets keep drowning him out with every attempt.
“Whiskey! I’ll have a whiskey!”
The heads lights are blinding and the horn is deafening. His car pulls through the turn colliding head on with another vehicle. All the while he’s screaming “Whiskey!” as loud as he can.
Slowly the reception of his radio kicks in. The music is blaring. He closes his eyes because he knows what’s next, but there isn’t a white light and there is no tunnel, just blood and sequins.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
"It worked though!" my dad exclaimed as we talked about it via my iphone that was plugged in to the cigarette lighter and charging in my car. I'm sure everyone has had those moments thinking to themselves "What did I ever do before...?". I've really felt the pain the last few weeks. We moved into a new place and for whatever reason, mainly laziness, I put off getting the internet hooked up. Once I finally got around to doing it, the installation date was a week out and naturally they hooked it up at the 11th hour.
I've never realized how dependent on the internet I am for spitting out a 1000 words. I'd like to believe it's because I only write in google documents anymore, but that's not completely it. Typing on computers in general is pretty amazing, backspace alone has affected my life in ways I'll never know.
Technology overall has obviously made a lot of professions/industries a lot shittier though. How many people ever wrote anything outside of an essay before blogging popped up? Wedding photographers are a dime a dozen now with cameras going digital. It has to suck for those who had to tough it out with typewriters and and dark rooms. Sometimes I day dream about it all just giving out, but then how would I update my Facebook status?
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
The "night before" when I told my parents at 9pm I had a science project due the next morning or the time I had at least 20 pages worth of answers to fill in a hour before school started is a daunting memory. Just thinking about it I can still feel that knife in my stomach, digging deeper with every toss and turn as I rolled around in bed thinking about what was undone.
Saturday, August 21, 2010
All I could do was laugh.
I tried not to give it much thought, fearing that I might do the same.
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
"I'm not sure if I could pin point an actual date when I stopped, but it was sometime last fall. You were sitting on the porch when I arrived to your house by car. "What took you so long?" you said. It was all in your tone. I knew it would just be a matter of time."
This confession, all in my head.
"You know I still love you." I replied.
Friday, August 13, 2010
Life happens and you get busy. Maybe like me, you find yourself no longer working a 9-5 where you only have to do two hours of work a day to stay ahead of the curve. Perusing the internet and blogging filled the rest of my cubicle life.
Blogging has been so beneficial for me. It really helped me take the first step into writing. Nowadays I find myself consumed with writing articles and doing interviews for a local online magazine. As much as I enjoy it, I miss writing the daily/weekly blog entry and being in the blog community.
With that being said, I randomly came across a blog a friend of mine started recently, For Each Wind That Blows. Check her out! It's like the chick flick of blogs, with no drama!
Friday, July 30, 2010
Monday, July 12, 2010
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Saturday, June 05, 2010
Friday, May 21, 2010
Throwback: Ponce De Leon Baseball Park
Monday, May 10, 2010
Feed Your Head! Music
Thursday, April 22, 2010
They feared punishment. Substance is what I sought, something that was real, even if it was pain.
They are the faithful. Saying that they will do "His will", but only doing their own. Watching to see who is watching. The left hand always knowing what the right is doing.
Now I'm the sheep who forgot his way, the lost coin that cannot be found, the seed planted on rocky soil. I'm stuck in the thicket, I lay within the cracks, my roots have died and have scattered in the wind.
They cringe when I appear, teeth gnash. They think that I might test or even tempt them. Our morality the same, but I choose to be honest. One of the few commandments that I won't violate.
No longer the faithful servant, but I'm not the only one. The son who has gone to waste his inheritance, the prodigal who won't be returning home. I wouldn't be welcome. Unknowingly, they are the reason that they think I will burn.
Place the mill stone around my neck. I choose to be a stumbling block.
Saturday, February 20, 2010
This winter seems two seasons long. It’s fitting though, everything else has been numbing and long and drawn out as of late. Why not the weather? Once I settle in for the evening, I usually go for my night cap. The ice I put in my glass has freezer burn on it. Once poured though, the whiskey removes all traces.
The drink is doing something to me tonight. Lighting a fire inside my frozen body and thawing out what’s been numb. Two birds with one stone!
The holidays went by so quickly. I don’t remember Thanksgiving and I was sleeping in a guest bedroom during Christmas. I did receive a year supply of shaving cream and a book on serial killers though. Nothing like reading about a triple homicide to ring in the new year! And that’s just what I did while I worked. Happy New Year!
It snowed on “our” Valentine’s Day. After eluding work, I got her a DVD about Philadelphia and she helped me not forget about Dre. Some assholes destroyed our snowman hours after we brought him in to this world, but we do live in the South, so maybe it just wasn’t meant to be.
New things could be happening this year though. My Dad could potentially not have anyone living in his basement, my better half will be spending more time in the snobbier part of town due to work and I think I might just try gaining the “Freshman Fifteen”.
First things first though, Spring must arrive.
Friday, January 08, 2010
Everything is black. This room is large, but vacant. Maybe I’m outside or in a cage. I'm definitely in a spaceship. I could be wearing a mask. There would be more light if my eyes were closed.
I like it.
Someone’s talking. Each syllable they enunciate makes my head feel like a floor tom. Maybe it’s electronic, a drum machine that plays in rhythm with their every word. I hit the snooze button. The beat trails off and I feel like dancing. The bathroom is down the hall.
If I don't get up now I might piss myself, but I’m cold and pissing myself doesn’t seem like such a bad option when there's only two. The debate ends, my journey begins.
Trying to find the light switch on a wall reminds me of braille. If I was blind I would lose. If I was mute, pointing would be my way. If I was deaf I’d probably curl up and die.I am the epitome of human waste. I’d be completely useless if not fully functional.
The weak are truly strong.
Finally, the switch is between my fingers. It reminds me of a cigarette on its last drag, the thought causes me to dry heave. The switch is heavy and the click makes my ears ring.My eyes are still closed, but I’m surrounded by artificial light. It reminds me of my mother. As a child she would wake me for school in the morning by abruptly switching on the lights, singing and dancing to show tunes. I’m the only straight man that I know who can sing along to Rodgers and Hammerstein musicals.
I close my eyes when I think of dead girls staring at me.
Now I'm scared and wouldn't mind hearing my mother sing "My Favorite Things" to me. I hum along. My index finger involuntarily moving up and down to the chorus.
The bathroom is my finish line and I congratulate myself for finishing the race.
I step straight into the shower. My clothes haven't come off this fast since 6th grade. Relief is mine. I watch last night go down the drain.
The shower head releases it's power and it feels like acupuncture.
A love/hate relationship with China suddenly forms.
Pain or euphoria, Shang or Zhou, steamed or fried?
All of these decisions to ponder!
And now it sounds like someone is trying to break down the bathroom door.